Hissyfits Photography Blog

I know I’ve mentioned this before, but this is my life right now, so here it all comes again! The last two weeks have been rough to say the least. I have continued to be all out of whack after our trip to Kansas. Not that I want to complain about my life because I am blessed in so many ways, but getting in that car and driving back to a city and state that are far from home is far more challenging than mere words can convey. I try to take it all in stride…I mean, what are my options? Stay in Kansas with the kids and live with my parents? Yeah, I’d be “home” but Chris wouldn’t be there, so I still wouldn’t be happy. Thank goodness my sweet husband loves me unconditionally because he can certainly attest to the fact that the last two weeks here have been rough and downright miserable at times! He tries to be loving and supportive and to help me through it, but when I really can’t even explain what my problem is to myself, it isn’t realistic for him to understand it either. There have been many, and I mean many, tears shed on my part. I am not sure if it is because I am tired and pregnant or what, but I have most definitely had a hard time falling back into our life here.

I hate that. I hate being sad and down. I hate crying so often and so hard that the kids start to worry and console me. I am the mom. I should be able to hold it together. But I am also human. For many of you I am some random blogger who posts more pictures of my kids than you care to see and writes equally as much, but I am really so much more! I am a wife, a mom, a daughter, a sister and a friend. My feelings are every bit as real as yours and the emotions I experience are as intense as anyone else’s.

Adding to the frustration is the weather. It is about to drive me crazy! I LOVE winter. I love the way the chill puts an invigorating spunk into your step. I love the breath of fresh air you find when you step outside and it is 20-some degrees. I love the snow. And I miss it…all of it. I will be the first to admit that after now spending four winters out here we have most definitely acclimated and our bodies can’t handle it like we once could! When we visit Kansas now we freeze. It is SO cold we can hardly stand it! We will quite obviously have a lot of adjusting to do once we do move back!! But all that being said, I do still love and miss the winters!

Seventy five degrees is not winter. At all. But that is what is has been down here this week. I know, I know, the grass is always greener on the other side. Those living in the midwest would give anything for a break from their bone chilling cold fronts for some of this. And I would give anything for some good old fashioned winter weather. Recognizing that isn’t going to happen anytime soon and I need to “embrace” the fact that we can play outside right now and in just a couple of months it will be scorching hot and miserable out, we have been trying to spend some time in the backyard.

Tuesday afternoon we headed out with our blanket, books and cameras. We spread the blanket in the shade {which I quickly had to move to the sun because my acclimated body was freezing in the 75 degree shade!}, pulled out our books and read. All of us. And we of course took pictures of each other too! Can I tell you how much I love it when the kids pull out their cameras and want to snap pictures of each other and me? So sweet!

Since we were all on one blanket, these are super close {far closer than I would ever shoot normally but I couldn’t get off the blanket because the grass was still wet from the sprinklers!}, but I love them. I mean, LOVE them.

During a time in my life where happiness isn’t coming quite as easily as I wish it would, these bring so much happiness to my heart.

In this next series I was talking to him about his Valentine’s and if they were going to say “I Love You.” He thought it was absolutely hilarious and laughed and laughed and laughed some more!

{One reason photographers avoid shooting super close is because of what happened in this next one…his right eye isn’t in focus! Darn!! With the settings I was using and as close as I was I am lucky this only happened on this one!!}

Have I ever mentioned how much I adore his red hair? His coloring is just like mine…and I love that. The bummer of the deal is that I have this “issue” with boys having “long” hair and we keep his buzzed off and super short. It was crazy long for him in this picture…he got it all cut off just two days later!

Don’t worry…sassafrass lass was there too. Here are a couple of her! She has since gotten her hair bobbed back off as well…I need to get her in front of the camera this weekend so you can see how dang cute it is!!

I can’t believe how grown up she looks here. It is hard to believe that our “baby” is soon going to be a big sister.

I think about that a lot…how the dynamics of our family are about to change dramatically. How she will go from being the baby to the middle child. How she and Huntler are the very best of friends and where the baby is going to fit into all of that. They love each other so much…they truly take care of each other. Holding hands in parking lots, consoling each other when one gets hurt or in trouble, finding the missing blanket or stuffed puppy. I wish I could bottle that up…all of those moments that flash in my mind of the bond these two share. It is something special, really special.

Gosh I am a basket case! The tears are once again flowing freely as I think about all of this! I guess when you love your family SO much it is hard not to get emotional!

So…the photo a day challenge has been quite the challenge. I am hoping to be a better blogger next week! I plan to have a blurb book created for our family at the end of the year and I am desperately trying to record all of these moments that right now I think I will never forget but in a year will seem like a distant memory. Time seems to have that effect on us!

Happy Saturday!

Filed under my-lil-lollies, by Bethany